Bizarre sex stories: 7 strange sex incidents you couldn’t make up

7 bizarre sex stories that you couldn't even make up
Lonnie Hutton allegedly tried to have sex with an ATM (Picture: Police handout)

Amid disturbing reports about a US man who allegedly tried to have sex with an ATM, before trying his luck with a wooden picnic table, Metro takes a look at other bizarre sex stories that you just couldn’t make up.

7. The guy who tried to have sex with a drinks trolley

File photo dated 28/05/12 of a Heathrow Express train at Paddington Station as workers on the Heathrow Express rail service are to stage fresh strikes in a row over jobs, pay and cuts. PRESS ASSOCIATION Photo. Issue date: Thursday May 15, 2014. Members of the Rail, Maritime and Transport union will walk out on May 23 and Bank Holiday Monday, May 26. Keith Greenfield, managing director of Heathrow Express, said: "The RMT's misguided decision to strike again is further proof of the union executive choosing to ignore the reality that Heathrow Express needs to save £6 million of cost over the next five years in order to secure its future and jobs for its people. See PA story INDUSTRY Rail. Photo credit should read: Hugo Philpott/PA Wire
A train passenger attempted to have sex with a drinks trolley (Picture: PA)

Andrew Davidson, 25, had consumed a cocktail of legal highs and alcohol when he attempted to have sex with a drinks trolley on a busy train in 2013.

He was seen humping the trolley while shouting ‘I want to kiss you, I want to f*** you’.

After avoiding a prison sentence, his solicitor said: ‘It is something that has never happened before and is unlikely to ever happen again.’

6. The guy who ‘tried to have sex with an ambulance’

The guy set fire to a packet of peanuts before he began (Picture: File)
The guy set fire to a packet of peanuts before he began (Picture: File)

Another 25-year-old man was arrested after setting fire to a packet of peanuts before appearing ‘to try and make love to an ambulance’.

A court heard the man was in ‘relatively high spirits’ on a night out in Barnstaple, Devon, in 2011.

He was given a community order and told to pay a victim surcharge of £60.

5. The guy who tried to have sex with a car wash vacuum

car wash
A man was spotted acting suspiciously at a car wash (Picture: YouTube)

In 2008, a US man was arrested for ‘receiving sexual favours from a vacuum’ at a car wash in Michigan.

A witness, who saw the man acting suspiciously, said: ‘I’ve seen some strange things, but this is the weirdest thing I’ve ever heard.’

4. The vicar hospitalised with a potato up his bum

Bizarre sex stories: 7 strange sex incidents you couldn't make up
A potato landed a vicar in hospital (Picture: Alamy)

A clumsy vicar was hospitalised in Sheffield after accidentally getting a potato stuck up his bum, but it was definitely not due to a sex game.

Nurse Trudi Watson said: ‘He explained to me, quite sincerely, he had been hanging curtains naked in the kitchen when he fell backwards on to the kitchen table and on to a potato.’

3. The guy who had sex with his girlfriend’s dog

Staffordshire bull terrier, sex with dog
Wayne Bryson had sex with a Staffordshire bull terrier (not pictured) (Picture: Alamy)

A teenager avoided jail after filming himself having sex with his girlfriend’s pet dog called Rudi.  

Wayne Bryson’s girlfriend found the shocking footage on his mobile phone. A court heard it ‘was 30 seconds of madness’.

2. The guy who tried to have sex with sheep after a cow turned him down

STONEHOUSE, ENGLAND - MAY 13:  A sheep that was sheared by London mayor Boris Johnson and New Zealand's most successful competition sheep shearer, David Fagan looks out from a trailer at Lister Shearing Equipment  on May 13, 2014 in Stonehouse, Gloucestershire, England. Mr Johnson also visited Cheltenham and Gloucester today as part of the Conservatives local election campaign.  (Photo by Matt Cardy/Getty Images)
These sheep have not met the man in question Picture: Getty)

An IT worker tried to have sex with a sheep after a cow turned him down.  

The court heard: ‘He did not successfully penetrate the mouth of a cow with his penis and he then moved to another part of the field and tried his luck with some sheep.’

1. The guy who likes cheese a bit too much

‘Serial masturbator’ dubbed the 'Swiss cheese pervert' faces new charges
The alleged Swiss cheese pervert (Picture: Facebook / Mayfair TownWatch)

This guy likes to drive around his neighbourhood and offer women money to put cheese on his genitals (allegedly).

Chris Pagano, dubbed the Swiss cheese pervert, was arrested after police released a photo of a trouserless man dangling a slice of the smelly stuff in the air.

20 May 2014 | 12:09 pm – Source:

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