Every good thing that happens proves the Conservatives got it right


THE heatwave, puppies and the poisoning of Game of Thrones tyrant Joffrey show that austerity is working, the Tories have claimed.

Conservative chairman Grant Shapps stated: “I look outdoors and see blossom on timber, birds constructing nests and youngsters enjoying pleasant harmless video games, displaying the effectiveness of the bed room tax.

“Ordinary individuals having fun with a cup of tea, a Bourbon biscuit and Countdown ought to be reminded that all this stuff are solely attainable due to the introduction of market-led reforms to the NHS.

“Stubbed toes, wasps and the scarcity of Frozen merchandise are hangovers from Gordon Brown’s Labour administration.”

Ed Miliband has responded by promising that underneath Labour there will probably be extra Labradors chasing Frisbees, a larger probability of double rainbows, and simultaneous mass orgasms if a given set of financial circumstances N:28 am – Source: thedailymash.co.uk

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