These sex tech toys will blow your mind (Wired UK)



Any reader whose last recollection of a sex toy was the Rabbit
vibrator popularised by Sex And the City in the 90s, your
mind is about to be blown. This collection of enterprising gadgets
makes that bunny-eared device look rather pedestrian. Instead of
novelty styles, these integrate virtual reality,
internet-controlled orgasms and 3D printed members. If you’re faint
of heart, look away now.


British-made Pulse looks like Darth Vader’s helmet, but is
actually a “guybrator” designed for your, er, helmet. It’s
based on something called Penile Vibratory Stimulation, which
involves a custom-designed mechanical vibrator that can help men
with spinal injuries ejaculate so they can impregnate their
partners. Medical research has shown  that oscillations
applied in a very specific way can create powerful orgasms for men.
Pulse harnesses this through something called a “PulsePlate”, which
generates high-amplitude oscillations rather than low-amplitude
vibrations. The resulting movement is  “much bassier than
a vibrator — a bit more like a motorboat than something
high-pitched”. The movement is targeted at the highly sensitive
frenulum area of the penis.

Autoblow 2

Billed as “the world’s most realistic robotic oral sex simulator
for men”, Autoblow 2 differentiates itself from other male
masturbators such as the Fleshlight in
that you don’t have to operate it using the movement of your hand.
Looks-wise, it’s R2D2 to Pulse’s Vader. Users just plug the device
into the wall, then insert their member into the rubbery sleeve.
Then beaded rings slide up and down the outside of the sleeve. The
product was available for pre-order on Indiegogo, where it hoped to
raise $45,000 (£26,000) but ended up with almost $300,000

According to Autoblow’s creator, the device marks “a giant leap
towards improving the realism of the male masturbation experience”.
If you are worried about putting your genitals into something
plugged into the mains, the Autoblow team reassures: “There is
absolutely no way to electrocute yourself while using this product.
Also — a pressuresensor automatically cuts off power to the motor
if it is under a heavy load.” Well that’s a relief.


Vibease is a Bluetooth-enabled vibrator that links to a mobile
app and lets women sync the vibrations of their device to an
audio fantasy of their choice. The team behind the vibrator says
that Vibease focuses on “the biggest sex organ” — the brain. At
3.1 inches, it’s discreet and designed for clitoral stimulation
rather than penetration. It’s also quiet and “wearable”, in
that it can be popped inside your underwear and left there for
daytime funsies. It’s silicone and has a USB-chargeable battery
that lasts up to three hours.

Dildo Generator

If you can’t find the perfect toy, then why not 3D print a
highly customised one? A website called Dildo Generator allows you
to do just that: it lets you tweak a phallic model until it
perfectly meets your preferences. Once you are happy with your
creation you can have it 3D printed. If you lack the imagination,
the New York Toy
offers a penis laser scanning service that allows
you to create a playful replica of a friend or partner’s organ.

VR Tenga

This is more of a hack than a product, but it combines a
Japanese version of the Fleshlight,
called Tenga, attached to a haptic controller called the Novint
Falcon, and an Oculus Rift headset with manga porn animations. The
Heath Robinson-esque contraption would involve the user putting
their penis into the Tenga and watching porn through the headset:
the action taking place in the headset would be replicated by the
robo-orifice setup. There is an excruciating video of it working here. As the first
commenter on the YouTube video puts it: “in the future, you’ll have
little cartoon girls wank you off.”


Long distance relationships wouldn’t be the same without
teledildonics. Kiiroo involves a pair of sex toys — one for a
man and one for a woman, which can allow for remote intimacy. OPue
is a touch-sensitive vibrator, that measures the “depth and speed
of penetration” and then relays that information over the internet
to the male toy — the SVir — so that the man can “feel” it.
So far, it’s a one way street: guys communicate with the female sex
toy. For those who don’t have someone to play with, the same
devices can be synced with porn. 

Wakeup Vibe

This is the multitasking vibrator that acts as an alarm clock
and a pleasure producer. In order for it to work, you need to
awkwardly sleep with the device pressed against your nether
regions. The toy promises to “start the day with good vibrations”.
You may want to stick to the Beach Boys’ song. 




This terrifying looking toy has a wheel of ten “teasing” tongues
that will “lap you to orgasm”. It doesn’t vibrate or thrust,
but it does look a little bit like a circular saw.  Supposedly
it’s a realistic oral sex simulator, and there’s a travel version
called Sqweel Go should you so wish.

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