Unicorns are incredibly rare — some say mythical. Gin is substantially less so, and very much real. Gin made from unicorns’ tears and bottled with mystic silver? That probably splits the difference, to be fair.
British gadget vendors and — apparently — inventive alcohol purveyors Firebox have somehow managed to bottle the liquid sorrow of hair metal’s favourite steeds though, and turned it into a new tipple. Appropriately enough, it’s being referred to as “Magical mother’s ruin”.
The “magical concoction” even contains edible real silver pieces, so it should be good for keeping werewolves at bay. As long as they’re alcoholic werewolves, of course. Throw a little blood (orange) in there, and you’re probably good to distract vampires too.
Firebox even offers a few cocktail suggestions to add the Unicorn’s Tears to. You might want to try “Unicorn Fizz”, made of Unicorn Tears, prosecco, and lemon peel, or a “Tears Collins”, which is the signature gin coupled with lemon juice over ice, topped with soda.
Sadly, the product is not cruelty-free. Firebox says “many, many unicorns were harmed in the making of this beverage”, and that “those frisky little buggers aren’t easy to snag”.
Gin connoisseurs may be interested to know the drink is set to hit the nose with a fragrant blend of juniper, curaçao orange and crisp lemon, with hints of mint and lemongrass.
It’ll be on the sweeter end of the gin scale, described as tasting of “candied orange peels, flying saucer sweeties and a hint of maple syrup” with a spicier edge thanks to juniper berries and cardamom.
Unicorn Tears costs £40 a bottle and needs to be pre-ordered ahead of its 25 September launch. We guess hunting all those unicorns and making them cry is expensive work.